other complaints

-my health card is "missing" (again) i think this woman stole it though to use for dispensaries, so i hope i find it.
-my kodak digital camera from 2007 is dying, the battery is dying.
-my phone sucks. its the worst "smart" phone ive ever owned.
-i dont have any clothes. i lost all of them when i mistakenly listened to my awful male parent and brought them to manila and had to scramble and escape out with the help of my uncles and aunts.
-i dont have any stuff, my stuff is drastically reduced, i lost my materials, supplies, ephemera, furniture, everything.

so im really tired now and dont see anything enriching me, nourishing me, caring for me, i see no end to this empty nothing, so it makes me very weary, i am really tired.


so im just going to go buy a knife because making a wire cutter with no base is stupid
distilled water
food, im starving

i hate life right now
im pissed my health card is missing
and other important things like my bank card when the landlord was harassing me, now my health card is missing (i think it was stolen) its raining today, there isnt anything good. theres never anything good what the actual fuck.

Missing Health Card

my health card has gone missing from my wallet. i hope im wrong and that its in my room. but its not.

Leave in Scalp Tratement, Massage Gel, and Vitamin B3 Moisturizer

Ive made some new stuff!

The almond milk cream hair rinse took a wild turn! The no citric acid rinse is perfect as a leave in scalp treatment, just wow. Its in a smaller bottle now, the first one on the left.

Its so nice I made it again but into a massage gel, same recipe, no almond milk, slightly more guar gum. One of the massage gels has some of the moisturizer in it (the one with the bubbles because i shook it) because i transferred the bottle, and its actually more slippery for longer. Pretty neat-o.
I kind of want to make that ph rebalancing gel for the vagina. Its called rephresh gel and its really expensive. it contains water, glycerin, a polymer, some kind of antibacterial calcium or something and 3 paraben preservatives and lye. i dont understand how to rebalance vaginal ph but i will try to learn. for a poon wash, probably not to insert because im using guar gum from the bulk store. lol.

Also made a b3 moisturizer last night (last bottle on the right) put some on this morning at around 9:30 and the scent lasted 4 hours (even after biking through the city heat)

So I am really pleased with the development of my product line. Its difficult to finalize and say ok this is done, needs a few months testing for stability and i need to figure out a better way to weigh out the preservative because im unsure if my scale can accurately measure .05 - .2% every single time, specially when i am making really tiny batches.
my hands are all dry now from washing my hands 20 times a day with all the soaps that havent even cured yet so its time to make some lotion and moisturizer.

Fully Gelled Soap

Ah look, we have achieved full gel.

But I can see why sometimes I wont want to. The colour and texture...

I like the creamy opaqueness of the cold process soaps too.
but the texture of this quality soap is very nice!

Here are the pics!
this is me mixing it up in my room
 finally! a gorgeous fancy top part
 i insulated it for gel phase and screeched when i came back and had a peek!
 i wasnt sure if the sides would gel too
 so i put a light on it
 and it heated up
 and fully gelled!
 heres the set up in my room
 the temperature was at 155 degrees f (68 degrees centigrade)
 i thought it would go completely clear
 but it only went translucent. maybe because there were some bubbles :(
 i put it in the fridge for a bit (wrapped) but took it out and let it cool off on its own
 and it was ready this morning!
 so i cut it up and its drying on the rack now
 fully gelled soap!
this soap has sunflower oil, coconut oil, castor oil, hemp seed oil, and shea butter
it is scented with peru balsam and benzoin, for a creamy and vanilla like scent, mild and pleasant and sweet
i have used distilled water and rosemary oleoresin extract to avoid orange spots in the future (rancidity)
when i took the cosmetics training course in manila, the chemist advised us to use preservative in the lye water (which i didnt do because i used distilled water and an antioxidant in the oils but might in the future)

Sidetrack Over

got that weird "i need to use guar gum let me see what other people are doing" obsession over. i wonder whats going to happen to my weird slippery gel conditioner.
anyway i made a new soap recipe, finally finalized my swap, and have been playing with the polysorbate 80. my oil work area is really messy! and i keep having this gnawing feeling about the posting up the rest of the records and the old supplies and what can be done with them. battles.
there are so many things to make and do, can barely decide on which would be best. 

Almond Milk Cream Hair Rinse Recipe / leave in conditioner

I made thick acidic almond milk! To be used as hair conditioner. Starting with
I think its going to work but im not sure if it will weigh hair down so i will make a few different trials.
this first one is simple, strained almond milk (ph 6), then i added citric acid until it went to ph 4. then i added guar gum and blended it. as you can see i probably shouldnt have blended it anymore for the picture.

this was the hemp seed milk pre blending. hulled hempseed (35 grams) to 200ml distilled water.

it blended really well. i found this https://patents.google.com/patent/US20130202777A1/en and thought this is cool. i kept blending it till there were no more noticeable bits, kind of surprized about this actually. i tasted a drop and it was sweet. spread the milk onto my hands and it was very moisturizing!! but then i got an allergic reaction so i stopped. my whole mouth got itchy and my throat was closing a bit and my hands and face started itching like crazy. from the bulk food store :/ so i guess i shouldnt handle it at all.

so i made almond milk from ground almond instead! (about 25 grams) to 250 ml water.
strained the pulp with my coffee filter (i know it looks really gross) but i didnt strain it through the paper anymore because it felt fine (its a rinse off product)
 here is the cup of almond milk (came to less than a cup on this measuring cup)
 the ph tested 6
 to 15 grams of the milk i added citric acid (.25 grams) and the ph dropped to 5
 i added an additional .25 grams and it dropped but is it 5 or 6
so i added an additional .50 grams and it dropped to 4. so i dont even know if this is safe lol. i mean what if someone makes this and it burns their scalp off man ill get in trouble.
 to this is added a really tiny amount of guar gum .06 grams and blended it and i think i added more in requally small amounts (i didnt take these notes) and then it became this stuff.
im not sure if the proteins from the almond milk are stable ? because i was looking at it as a form of digestion, so is it a predigested protein for your hair? im not sure. its like is this the crebs cycle and how or what did i make? so thats all i got. im going to make another portion with essential oil and baobab oil and polysorbate 80 and the urea preservative which also aids in getting the actives into our body. i dont know if its going to preserve or stay stable. but its great as a citric acid rinse (ive only tried the one without the milk) and apparently black girls make guar gum hair gel (saw some youtube videos)
im having terrible residual allergy symptoms from the hemp seed milk. so serious omg i have to buy allergy medication now. booooooooo

one bottle has citric acid, one does not!
the citric acid bottle also has more mct oil and the original essential oil scalp blend (it smells very medicinal with rosemary, peppermint, hyssop, ravensara, green coffee, its kind of a viral infection blend because i became aware of peoples viral infections on their scalp when working as a massage therapist. so turns out you can get hpv warts on your head, and also dermatitis feeds on the staph virus on your head so this aromatherapy blend aids in reducing these viruses as well as stimulates blood flow)
anyway if the one without citric acid turns out to be a good conditioner, great, if not i can always add citric acid to it if it turns out to be too residual-heavy on my hair.
these are both preserved with the urea preservative.
actually i forgot to add the pumpkin seed protein. woops. 
should i add it? to which one?
ok i tried the citric acid one
it made my hair feel like doll hair but when it dried, the strands were like, i dont know, more compact and smooth but it didnt feel slippery. so i rinsed it off again. i think its too acidic for me too, and will take it back to 5 or 6 ph. 
ill try the one with no citric acid tomorrow.
my hair is super fine and theres so little of it, so it needs to be fluffy and dry, so any amount of the rinse left in my hair makes it appear kind of wet looking with the strands easily coming together. i think this rinse is probably perfect for people with thick curly hair, making shiny and chunky curls.
25 grams ground almond
250 ml water (one cup) (sorry this isnt very precise) 
blend these two until you have almond milk, strain with a coffee filter / mesh

prepare: 3.5 grams of essential oil blend and nutritious oil blend, and polysorbate 80. omit if you do not have it. reduce oil blend to 1.5 grams if you do not have polysorbate 80. i used mct oil, and baobab oil (try almond, coconut, argan etc) 

add this oil and polsorbate 80 blend to some distilled water
then add it to your almond milk.

add 1/8 tsp of guar gum to your milk-oil. mix it in, or blend, avoiding bubbles, and let it sit until it thickens.
add more guar gum if you want it thicker, but do wait until the guar gum is absorbed because it thickens considerably.

add .5 grams of citric acid at a time until it reaches your desired ph. 

i made it to 4 or 5 and i think its too strong for my scalp. so add a little at a time.

weigh your product and add your preservative accordingly. if you do not have preservative just use it all up at once, or make less. 
not sure how long fresh almond milk lasts. not long so make sure to use distilled water as well.

. now i have NO IDEA if this will hold up, spoil, burn your scalp off (you can avoid this by taking out the citric acid) (but then it might be too heavy on your hair) nor do i know what actually happens to the almond milk when you add citric acid. I HAVE NO IDEA but anyway my hair feels Super Soft and fluffy and smells lovely (after the second rinse with just water-as made, its kinda strong for me because i felt some tingling on my scalp so i probably burned it oh god i hope i dont lose any more hair. *sighing* so probably my roommate wont try it cos shes got black hair and doesnt want to mess it up so i have to find a new test subject. but ill add more water to the citric acid one to bring the ph to about 5.5/6 ) 

ok so theres a recipe i came up with you can try to use AT YOUR OWN RISK 
but if its great please add a comment!!!


ok wow the one with citric acid i added more distilled water to it but it seperated :( but i already gave it to my bleached coworker. and tried the non citric acid one myself and its freakin amazing as a leave in? i was going to add citric acid to it but i am just going to make another one and give her this as is. its minty and tingles maybe the citric acid one that i thought was burning was just the peppermint. and i ruined it by adding more water? anyway i will try again. 
it doesnt leave an oily residue as a leave in for my scalp. and its watery enough to squirt out of a spray bottle right onto my scalp. *swooning*
i think ive made the leave in scalp treatment of my dreams (well maybe i wont be using bulk ground almonds, ill buy a sealed package. lol.) it doesnt leave my hair greasy and i can use all the essential oils i need without having to use a traditionally oily carrier.

so my sidetrack turned into this whole new cool thing i dreamed about ages ago when my hair started falling out. i thought i had alopecia but the doctor thought it was an iron and b deficiency. oh yeah ill add vitamin b3 to the scalp treatment. *swooning* i love making this stuff, its cheaper than therapy and way fun.

Citric Acid Conditioner ?

I think i made citric acid conditioner? i was using citric acid to rinse out soap scum but it turns out once my hair got used to the soap i made i didnt really need a conditioner anymore.

1/4 tsp guar to 1/3 c water and 1/16 tsp citric acid (these are all approximate ratios) (i used the ph strip and no scale, which ill make one after i try this blind recipe)

its ph was 5 and i lowered it to 4. is that too acidic?

and its got micelles of castor oil in it. should i have used a different oil (you can see not all the guar gum is dissolved yet)

im going to try it out as a rinse for my hair soap and see what happens.

was playing with the guar gum and its super. so no guar gum lotion yet but maybe this is a conditioner.

not really sure why it takes me so long to play with ingredients?
now im all excited because i think i made hair conditioner.

i guess its a thickened acid water / rinse, and it has some oil in it.
is it a conditioner?


i guess if i add the polysorbate to the oils then add it to citric acid water then add the guar gum, then its kinda like conditioner.

what took me so long to do this? i didnt even need to think about it because ive been reading about hair stuff for so long now (cos my hair fell out remember)
i just needed the space and peace to sit down and focus on doing it.

did i make conditioner? i will try a better trial later. i think the guar gum needs 8 hours to fully absorb? and how long will it last?

here is one with more pics + almond milk

Skin Brightening Lotion

I think I used expired cetyl alcohol nf, im not sure, it wasnt stored properly and has been sitting around for ages.
other than the waxing effect of the cetyl alcohol this lotion i think feels ok-good. i chickened out using a water phase thickener like arrowroot or guar gum so ill try that with just regular oil.
so anyway this skin brightening lotions ph might be 6. i have no ph meter and used a test strip on some of the lotion in distilled water and it tested 6 but i dont think thats accurate at all (https://www.researchgate.net/post/How_to_measure_pH_of_cosmetic_cream_formulation_accurately)
so i almost want to add the b3 because it says not to add it to acidic formulas to prevent nicotinic acid formation through oxidation upon contact with water. not sure but i guess it turns into niacin and too much of that internally i know makes your skin flush. but because i dont know the ph.... (is my arm burning? i dont know, its tripping me out)

anyway this lotion is nonionic but im not really sure what that does in terms of skin care properties (need more research)

it has
aloe vera
nutritious oils: mct, hemp, pumpkin seed
precious oils: meadowfoam, rosehip, baobab
2% fruit acid (alpha hydroxy acid) (so its not very strong because I dont have a ph meter)
helichrysum extract
(and i might add the vitamin b3)

im trying it out on one suntanned arm. at night. and on my face, there are three sun spots on my cheek i want to fade.
no essential oil blend to scent it yet, i cannot decide.

here are the pics!

measuring out the ingredients

here is a video of the emulsification!!

mixing mixing ... had bubbles because i was pressing too strong while holding the camera :(

after cooling a bit, it thickened well, i was actually kind of hoping for a more watery lotion but i didnt use a water phase thickener and instead used cetyl alcohol

maybe ill take better pics tomorrow or just for the next trial where i will try a starch as a thickener so the lotion is more water
p.s. i learned all this lotion speak from : http://swiftcraftymonkey.blogspot.com/ 

p.p.s. im scenting this blend with my anti-aging calming essential oil blend -it smells great but now got a bad batch of galbanum oil from a different supplier so it doesnt smell as good as the original calming blend :( still good though.

july 12th 10:30 pm
i dont know if i should add the aromatherapy blend to this lotion. i think its going to go bad or something. i forgot it in my rush to leave for the day and left it in my room with plastic wrap over it and it was stuffy and hot in my room. it seems fine but it probably isnt. so im just going to use it up as is and try again. i actually really freaking love this lotion. its got a great "squishy" texture, it only does the waxing effect when you have a huge glop on your arm, otherwise it disappears quick and aborbs well, has a dry feeling, but there is a slight drag that takes a while to absorb (maybe 10 mins) and i swear it reduced my brow furrow, and smoothed the texture of my skin after the 5th ot 6th application. i usually put it on after a shower or when i wash my face and i just rub it in for a while cos i space out while im doing it thinking about how awesome it is i made a lotion that i wouldnt be able to afford if it was in a store. and that ill always be able to do this and only get better at it.
the other one unfortunately i transferred to a dirty container because i know i didnt sanitize or wash it properly and it was also in my room all day and the container smells bad. like a slight smell of something that doesnt smell botanical or fresh at all so its in the sink looking forlorn. im really bummed about my lack of facilities and containers, but i am really stoked on the skin brightening lotion formula and kind of want to make it again without cetyl alcohol, but i dont know what to replace it with. starches. maybe. honestly my skin is so damn smooth now i am so impressed with the stuff really. i just hope i can make money off my ideas somehow because im so broke on welfare and it makes me anxious that i cant do what i want to do because of lack of money and lack of people around me who understand me when i speak. most people think im really dumb. its really disappointing to me and insulting but what can you do.

Bath Oil, After Shave, and Body and Hair Spray

new supplies are in!

Nutritious oils -pumpkin seed, hemp seed full omega, castor, peach kernel, mct oil
Precious Oils -meadowfoam, baobab, rosehip (high in vitamin A and E)
Actives -fruit acids, helicrysum extract, niacinamide, aloe vera
New Essential Oils (new perfume blends plus classics restocked)
Cannabis Oils (cbd high strain and/or thc active infused oil and/or live resin)

 to create the following:
custom blends welcome (your choice)

Bath Oil (melts in water)
contains nutritious and precious oils with an aromatherapy essential oil blend, fixative (glucose), solubilizer (polysorbate 80)
added to a hot bath, the oils melt into the water. do not apply directly to skin because this product needs to be diluted.

After Shave Lotion / Toner (classic lotion water) ph balanced
after shave lotion may contain a blend of: aloe vera juice, glycerin, nutritious oils, precious oils, fruit acids (alpha hydroxy acids) (billberry, sugar cane, maple, orange, and lemon), plant extracts, essential oil perfume blend, fixative (glucose), solubilizer (polysorbate 80) and preservative

Body Spray / Hair Revitalizer - ph balanced
body and hair revitalizing spray contains
-a concentrate "just add water"
-aloe vera, glycerin, nutritious and/or precious oils, essential oil perfume blend, fixative and solubilizer, urea + iodine as a preservative
 - hair spray features essential oils that promote hair growth and a healthy scalp
 - body spray features a tanning option (with photosensitive oils) and your choice of precious oil

These are the products that can be made for you for the cost of shipping (free product) with the promise to provide me feedback that I can use as a public reference "anecdotal information"
Or you can buy a set of three (travel size) or one (large size) for $10 plus shipping (Canada Post)
Bath Oil
After Shave / Toner
Body / Hair Spray

*the preservative is a non-paraben based broad spectrum preservative made of 99% Diazolidinyl Urea (DU) and 1% Iodopropynyl Butylcarbamate (IPBC)

My friend from Vancouver is designing packaging but we have no money to actually make the packaging? I'm trading him a custom skin care regimen and these products for now.
North American female run small business code of honor is pitifully optimistic isn't it?

Lotion Trial

Today is the lotion trial day (it started at 11, so im hiding out in the blog)

So of course before even starting or attempting to make the lotion
I am also hiding out daydreaming and reading swiftcraftymonkeys blog posts on lotions.

Point of Interest!: Lotions: A basic recipe

Point of Interest!: The argument for heating & holding lotions

Point of Interest!: If you're new to lotion making...

Point of Interest!: When lotions go wrong!

also the whole desk needs to be cleared and cleaned and so does the kitchen stove area etc, so actually i was looking up buying a hotplate so of course the first store i hoped to find one was studio brilliantine

but what about a gas burner with mini stand

anyway so im clearing the desk and have been trying to get my motivation back after getting chased and traumatized by the landlord steve.
its pretty shit. i freakin hate the guy. ok anyway im trying to not be traumatized but that doesnt diminish the severity of his assault toward me in my own "home"

ok its 4:24
finally have distilled water
all the soaps are probably rotting now from contamination and tap water

specially the cannabis soap i gave away at the free event
i think the lotion failed
i will update again


its kind of waxy
so i guess i should go to shoppers and get some glyserine

wow heating and holding was intense and difficult over the stove

im tired

and my lotion might be partially candle wax.

so i dont know if the lotion is good? im not sure what the one wax really is? i bought it from the woman up by finch. so far.
it seems fine on my dry leg
but it looks waxy/shiny on my hands/ palms/ fingertips

it doesnt really do the waxy effect

its got
shea butter
pumpkin seed oil
hemp seed oil
mct oil
aloe vera
cetearyl alcohol and polysorbate 60 or emulsifying wax nf
the weird unknown wax might be cetyl and stearyl alcohols ?
trace essential oils
iodine (99% Diazolidinyl Urea (DU) and 1% Iodopropynyl Butylcarbamate -germall plus)

so im going to try again tomorrow i guess it needs to be bottled up should have done it sooner.

woah its really great on my leg. if i add green coffee oil is it a cellulite lotion?

so im pretty excited about it

i wanted to make a skin brightening lotion but ill try the other emulsifying wax and a stronger concentration of the aloe vera powder first. maybe different oils too. i wanted a sunflower one so my skin barrier function improves. ive been getting ash dry skin when i forget to put lotion on :(

just a plain lotion with a runnier texture? lotionpro 165 tomorrow plus water phase thickener (i have rice bran, arrowroot powder, and guar gum) (i have no idea what im doing)

and these need to sit around for ages before i give one to someone, what if it separates?
if i give it to a friend, my friend will tell me, but what if i give it to a stranger and they don't tell me but tell everyone else how awful my lotion was?


yuck i bought a galbanum off a seller i never bought from before and it sucks! its the worst. they told me their galbanum has the highest content of (whatever) it smells like pine oil it smells like turpentine it smells like... gross. im super disappointed cos i think it was 13 dollars for a sample or something comapred to my old supplier who i dont know why i didnt order from this round, man i regret it. oshun.ca has such high quality oils like so much better. im pretty disappointed. i bought the new galbanum that smells like nail polish remover from botanic planet. im super disappointed. it doesnt smell like oshuns galbanum At All wow the difference is like what is this galbanum from botanic planet, gasoline?
ok i actually have pine oil and its worse.
i dont know how the same oil can smell so different and how one can have the highest content of whatever in canada unless its adultered? i dont get it. the smell is So Different. when i make money again and want to reorder a new library ill go back to oshun. its a higher minimum but its really worth it.
no soap trial today, lotion kit arrived, and i bought some mini screw top jars (about 5 ml) 6 for $1.25 at the dollar store yesterday? sheesh. so great. so they are all sterilizing now and i need to clean my whole room and the kitchen and mop and wipe everything to reduce dust...just so i can make a tiny lotion. kill me now!!!! i dont have a lab or anywhere remotely clean. patrice moved to a spanking brand new loft space and dropped my chair off last night but i didnt see him. im hoping he wants to forgive himself for being so terrible to me and give me the keys so i can go use his loft while he is at work. now wouldnt that be ideal? ;D

ok one of the landlords freaked out on me and evicted me today with a notice? so i couldnt work or concentrate. so i have to deal with that next week and waste more time on these people terrorizing me, go to the landlord tenant board office, right when i was getting really excited about making my small trials for my new obsession (eventual money making through spending all my money trying to learn something) making the best products i can make and use on myself because i cant afford to buy expensive products i would rather buy the supplies and learn about it and try to make it through diet and proper holistic and mindful health.

yeah so im traumatised and grossed out because it feels like some creepy thing is constantly running scams on me? how can all these landlords be the same scenario and situations, its pretty awful when you cant afford your own place and have to live with strangers and creeps and loser types whos only power in life is harassing their tenants. a lot of landlords are like this. specially the ones who let anyone live there and dont maintain the unit, the little holes in the city where its pretty safe if you can navigate personalities.  but honestly now im annoyed and have to stop my momentum again and im just totally creeped out.
im starting work this coming week and can get off social assistance! cos it makes me complacent and then landlords like this dont even deserve the government money.  even though i just got back and have to heal from my recent trauma by mistakenly going back to manila and almost getting murdered and locked away for god knows how long (that was terrifying) i have to also now heal from these traumas living here in this creepy weird rat hole
i am honestly so tired of landlords like this. disgusting.
so tomorrow im volunteering at a mini repair cafe event for sewing and jewelry.  havent the energy to post up links etc.... on the blog.

im so crazy tired and feel traumatised by the landlord steve today he was coming into the house practically chasing me around like following me, i had to get my camera out and record it, he was calling me names, trying to rally up his family to get in on harassing me, i was literally trying to get away from him and he was following me saying get back here im not done talking to you, and he pushed my door open trying to get into my room
fuck im honestly so god damn tired of these freaking landlords like almost every single landlord ive had since parkdale has been a nightmare, harassing me straight up like theres something about me that drives a certain type of dissatisfied and listless and arrogant man right off!!!! its terrifying.

Lotion Kit Arrived!!!!!

I made up some simple lotion recipes and the kit has finally arrived after paying customs! I should have just gone to brampton or missisauga but now that its all neat and tidy in one package and super high tech I am so excited and will open it later or tomorrow. Later. Now!!!
But after I make a chypre sunflower stearic acid soap. then i have busy. so maybe later. Im so excited!!!!!

Chypre Sunflower Stearic Acid Soap (cold process - gel phase)

Sunflower soap with Stearic Acid scented with the classic Chypre

im so excited to use this in the shower!!!!
and what concentration?

going to replicate the same recipe. i posted it on twitter. and no trying to gel phase it. the gel phased soap is still soft and i cant smell any of the mild blend i added in.

so i will add the .5 grams of the oil blend at trace because thats what i did with the first cannabis soap (the coconut one) and how the scent dissipates is amazing.

couldnt find the container so i ended up using a milk carton. then i found the container but it was too late.

put it by the window about 10-20 mintes after mixing in the essential oil blend (because i was hesitant to gel phase it due to the citrus oils and heat) but im glad i did. i wonder how long this will take to dry and what colour it will end up. it wasnt as bright white as the original sunflower with stearic acid soap due to the essential oil blend.

 see that cracked surface
its a good sign according to eviks blog

going to make one more with the peru balsam chypre blend i made last night.

i didnt. i made the regular chypre with the green chypre (i made two versions, one has a green note from cape may and green coffee and actual cannabis live resin "atomic jack" strain)

so here is the gelled soap unboxed. i put it in the freezer for a bit because i am impatient.

its not as white as the unscented one. to note: the unscented one kind of smells like stale cooking oil now. im not sure if it smells like that when used though

and here is the other one, not gelled

this soap smells great. its got this classic cologne scent.
pops out of the mold really easy. i suppose some point ill have an actual soap mold. or find another suitable organizer.

this girl said the chypre scent to her smells like some kind of chest rub?
i was disappointed. lol.
the benzoin vetiver and sandalwood blend she said smells like grass and wood. so i guess thats pretty accurate. overall impression i dont think she liked either of them. lol.

 they are so nice and shiny when polished a bit


Chypre Accord


found it on the internet, and made an interpretation of the ratios.

smells freakin amazing wow


made another one as i had a drop of peru balsam in carrier and added this blend plus a drop of vetiver and it smells freakin dynamite

why cant i meet guys that wear perfume like this,


im going to make a chypre soap
hope the citrus wont dissipate


Great Post on CBD in topicals and wild claims


is that omni, their cbd salves have dmso



im making an oil blend right now.

but reading up on labdanum and cistus (had no idea)

and if you look down to the mapped out species in the genus 
thats what i want to see with weed
and studies backed with the aromatic compounds and their triggers in our systems
how the maturity of the resin on plant, by curing, etc varies the effect of the strain, not withstanding potency or cultivation method. standard. like there are some strains that are standard but there are so many potentially made up names
its an intense map!

but im making a chypre
and an amber

essential oil perfume blends

no live tweeting a soap trial tomorrow because busy in the morning.
i just made an oil blend and it smells wonderful
benzoin, sandalwood, and vetiver. its this classic scent i have smelled before. it also kind of smells like "nag champa" but really, really nice. camphorous, woodsy, powdery, sweet, resinous, its pretty amazing.

its tricky standardizing the recipes for the perfume blends i make without supplies, syringes, small glass vials, a better scale, the list goes on. i can drop approximates forever but standardizing a blend is impossible for me right now

 i want to sell these blends in little roll on bottles for $5 each because i would totally buy an essential oil perfume for $5 even if it was so small. there is a small shop near my house that sells miniature roll ons for a dollar each.

want to get some dilluting vials at the dollar store to smell all the new oils.
the organizing and making accurate and right is endless and tiring. you got to learn to let go of ocd and just add a drop here and a drop there and be ok with not being a scientist in a lab.


ok i just tried to give this guy who wears axe some of my new blend and he said its for women, its perfume (guys wear cologne)
and im like,
insulted. lol.

so probably my products arent for the axe wearing crowd unless i get my costs down hella and swarm mens product advertising with muscle-y guys.

i wonder what my perfume / cologne commercial would be?

hmmm... lets have an imagination sequence...... commencing in ten minutes.


the commercial is a muted high contrast but light and somewhat slightly gritty
its people walking around the city
and its the aromatic molecules wafting
and it looks like heat rising from hot concrete after a rain
or heat coming off cars in grid lock
and the wafting 
is a saturated slightly more colourful than the rest
its people coming and going on transit
on sidewalks
in the subway
some people follow the person absentmindedly
some notice and make it a point to follow along breathing the scent
some only notice when the person arrives
then its muted again
and when the person leaves, a waft of wavy blurring colour
and the person who noticed looks up and watches the person walk on

but i dont know when to advertise the name or brand?
maybe its just a black and white screen afterwards or something boring
or its a behind the scene look at someone putting some on before they go out


Soft Oil soap with Stearic Acid

making a stearic acid soap while reading about the stearic acid saponification
and found this!! http://swiftcraftymonkey.blogspot.com/2017/07/lushs-main-emulsifier-stearic-acid-and.html

here is the post on twitter and will upload it on the blog later with details


ok wow this soap
i need to do it again
and leave it in the mold!!
and add no scent
because this is the first evidence of gel phase, except for the initial trials when i didnt fully know what i was doing.and since i took it out of the mold, is this partial gel phase? because it would have just kept melting and turned into clear liquid again probably.

here are the pics
weighed everything out
 melting the stearic acid
 added the oils and the stearic acid solidified again
 reheating the oils and stearic acid
 right before boiling point of the water in the pan
 hot enough so i turned it off
 mixed in the lye and oils at around 100 degrees Fahrenheit
 was thick right upon contact of the lye
 this is after using the mixer
 such a creamy batter
 after a couple hours it was popping out of the mold
 so i popped it out
 and thought this was it
 then i wanted it to gel phase (outside of the mold was wrong)
 and it did!!!!!
 it almost collapsed when i checked the box. actually i put it out in the sun outside, then i took it back in because i changed my mind then i put it back in the box and by the window under the sun and by the time the sun moved it must have been less than an hour, i checked the box and it was So Soft and i freaked out cos its gel
so now its cooling off and it looks super nice.
will repeat the sun-gel phase and measure the temperature to see if the essential oils i can add will dissipate during process

ok its cut.
(5 pm)
so if i moved quicker it would have been done by 3!!

im using one half for me
in the shower


ok i just touched it.
it feels oily and its a bit cold and theres a bit of precipitation on it. maybe ill wait till tomorrow to use it.

ok it took me 5 seconds to slice off a bit and use it on my hands and its kinda soft and it totally works and i can faintly smell the hemp seed oil and the cannabis blend

this soap if repeated may take forever to fully harden because its ins value is very low (98) despite it already having fully saponified.  leaves a nice feeling on my hand and a natural plant / straw scent on my skin. ugh i want to use it right now but i dont want it to melt all away in the shower and its probably super alkaline. where are those test strips?
i have zero patience.

tomorrow will remake the cannabis soap with french green clay and gel phase it with hopes the essential oils wont dissipate.

(i havent done this i made other soaps)

these bars are kind of squishy and i havent tried them yet in the shower i want them a bit firmer before ruining them :D

--- this sunflower soap with stearic acid (ungelled) goes slimy after a few uses. booo. will wait till the end of the month and try again after saponification is done.