the make it fair is in less than a week! i am worried i am going to do my best to make as much as i can for the three days. ive made a lot of stuff already but its not nearly as much as i would like. im scared
i can totally do this, in fact, i am totally doing it.
i feel like i have so many problems. internal ones and external ones. i wish i knew how to meditate or anything like that to clear my thoughts. i will try to go for a jog today, fix my work tables,
and buy some fruits and vegetables to eat. yeah. ok that sounds like a good plan.

step 1. get dressed and go buy fruits and veggies.
step 2. eat fruits and veggies.
step 3. fix work tables.
step 4. go for a jog or a brisk walk.
step 5. drink plenty of water.
step 6. eat some more fruits and veggies.
step 7. make some more stuff: finish sewing the cut fabric, make bead chains.
step 8. assess and card all made items.
step 9. by now it should be time to go bed, when this happens, get ready, no distractions!
step 10. sleep.

wish me luck, day.
wish you luck, me.

updates:
12:27. having trouble finishing step 2. would like to move along to step 3 but am now lying in bed with a partially eaten banana, being lazy.
ugh.
so i asked an online i ching casting site (too lazy to even toss coins) 'what can i think of to help my mind state?' and got hexagram 3. nice.

I Ching Hexagram: 3
Name: Chun.
Keyphrase: Problems At The Beginning.
Formed By The Trigrams: Water over Thunder.

General: The first step towards true learning is acknowledging your inexperience.
Love: Provided you learn from the problem you have encountered you will get past the current stumbling block.
Business: Assess your business honestly and see how you could do better business.
Personal: If you have hit a setback then make adjustments to your lifestyle and the setback will only be temporary.

Overview: Chun is a reminder that although problems may be encountered they are often only brief - just like a thunderstorm. And like the land that benefits from the extra rain you too can benefit provided you learn from what has happened. Once any obstacle has been surmounted then your project will have the chance to thrive. But you need to be wary of reckless action. Recognize misleading and corrupt influences and forge alliances with those that are trustworthy. You are most at risk if you let your ignorance blind you to how much you have to learn.   --from http://www.psychic-revelation.com.

12:41. starts getting off bed, plans to finish eating the banana, may skip to step 7 for a bit, despite hexagram 3 telling me to fix my tables.
12:46. puts head down. wants to sleep.
12:51. opens eyes. must have had a cat nap. imagines, with disdain, how horrific a blog dedicated to a detailed timeline of every day would be. just like this, only much longer, lamer. with a lot of needless worrying and forgotten ideas. shudders. oh wait. isnt that what my blog is ;)
12:55. pauses.
12:56. pushes self off bed, goes for the banana, will publish post and close laptop.
2:11. skipped ahead to step 7. in the garage now, sewing. tea pot of green tea, still that half banana to go, lots of unsewn pouches. thinks about step 3.
2:57. i notice the machine needs internal dusting and thinks of how perfect a little brush would be to clean it, then remember this paintbrush that showed up beside the machine the other day. its magic. an 'if only life were like this' moment. maybe its luralie. i am still borrowing her machine >< she is so sweet and that seems like a really thoughtful thing to do. plus it keeps me from needlessly messing up her machine :D  9:43. just found out dennis found that paintbrush and randomly put it by the sewing table!
3:28. ironing. its really dark outside. its not even 4 yet, all over cast and dreary. thinks how this constant self updating is kinda helpful.
4:13. eew. one of the people im having issues with has been reading my blog. i feel dirty. i dont know anything about them i dont even go on their facebook. (hi guys) i hope this doesnt throw me off my working. i wont let it. im still sewing and might take that brisk walk on the elliptical machine. or maybe outside. i think i am starting to freeze down here.
5:42. took a hot shower to warm up, ate some food, hung out, thought about step 3 and even took a picture of my main table. there is another table downstairs that ill bring up when some areas get organized hopefully by tonight :D yeah. im trying to be all 'do it'. i want to sew the shirred waist skirts i got fabric for on monday after my chores and appointments. i am also trying to figure out how to truncate my posts. this one and some of the all-rambling-text ones are too long. here is my very chaotic work area in my room for the jewelry making.


6:06. i found the code to truncate posts yay. but i have a headache now. ugh. step 3, then the other part of step 7 (bead chain) and feel kinda bad i dont feel like doing step 4 anymore.
9:44. nothing. watched a movie, headache in full effect. i think i will go to sleep soon and start over tomorrow. i have a to do list.

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